Olympian Pie
by Aish Sheva
Summary: A songfic set to "American Pie" commiserating the lack of good fanfiction in the PJO community recently. Review if you are so inclined. Flames are accepted, but are rather pointless, as we work toward a common goal.


**Olympian Pie**

Hello. The following is a parody of the song "American Pie", basically mourning over the fact that the "good PJO fic" is, as of late, fairly obsolete. I would highly recommend listening to the song as you read the parody; otherwise the lines are sure to sound odd and disjointed.

I am greatly indebted to my wonderful beta-reader, the Epitome of Randomness.

Disclaimer: I am in no way affiliated with Rick Riordan.

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A long, long time ago...

I can still remember

When PJO fics were few and far between.

And if I'd known what I'd see today

The number of awful fics, I'd pray

That someone would believe what I had seen

Because if someone had told me

The horrible writers I would see

I would laugh in their face

Call them such a disgrace.

I can't remember if I cried

When I realized the turning of the tide

But something touched me deep inside.

The day the good fics died.

So sigh, sigh and get ready to cry

Navigate as of late

To FanFiction-ask why

PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh

This'll be the day good writers die

This'll be the day good writers die.

Did you write PJO,

And do you know why the writing's so

Low quality crap of late?

Do you believe in flames or not,

Can CC stop the nasty rot

Can you still read a story that is great?

Well, I know that I can't find the one

That'll prove to me the era's done

Of stupid Mary-Sues

It gives me a case of blues.

I'm fed up with all those damn OCs

And grammar that makes me yell, "Oh, please!"

And still we've yet to be appeased

For the day the good fics died.

They are no more, so

Sigh, sigh and get ready to cry

Navigate as of late

To FanFiction-ask why

PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh

This'll be the day good writers die

This'll be the day good writers die.

Now for so many months we've been on our own

Reading fics that make us all groan

But that's not how it used to be.

Once upon a time, the good writers reigned

For a while, the quality only gained

But now all that is over-sadly...

Oh, and if for a second you look away

From FanFiction when you look back you'll say

"How could these fics've multiplied?

I thought the flamers lied!"

Because, really, who would've thought

The havoc that bad fics have wrought

It's a trap in which all of us are caught

Since the day the good fics died.

They are no more, so

Sigh, sigh and get ready to cry

Navigate as of late

To FanFiction-ask why

PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh

This'll be the day good writers die

This'll be the day good writers die.

Plot mistakes, and spelling ones, too

And now it's up to me and you

To rectify what went so wrong

Review and tell them what's so bad

About their fic; don't make them mad

And try and spread the word about this song

Now there's something that you can do

Just tell bad writers in a review

Why their story is awful

And flames are NOT unlawful!

So if they've got any sense at all

The writers will listen to our call

Before PJO fics standing does further fall

From the day the good fics died

They are no more, so

Sigh, sigh and get ready to cry

Navigate as of late

To FanFiction-ask why

PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh

This'll be the day good writers die

This'll be the day good writers die.

Oh, I think we can do it if we try

I'm not making it up; it's not a lie

We can save the fics of PJO!

So come on, give CC, and give it quick

If you do it enough, maybe it will stick

And the good fics will again grow

Now you may think I'm pretty weird

But I assure you that this is what was feared

Not only just from me

But from the "Flames" community

And as the number of bad writers keeps on swelling

It expands daily; there's no telling

When it will stop, till then I'll keep yelling,

'Bout the day the good fics died

They are no more, so

Sigh, sigh and get ready to cry

Navigate as of late

To FanFiction-ask why

PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh

This'll be the day good writers die

This'll be the day good writers die.

A theory about how this came to be

From my friend: "Generation MTV

Kids are the ones writing now

None of them have read a lot

That's why their stories are lacking plot

As well as all of the usual 'wow' "

So, please, have someone beta-read

Follow the TOS, the writer's creed

Come up with a decent plot-line

Don't hurry, take your sweet time

Because all the fics that were the best?

The authors worked harder than the rest

And you can do it, too; make good writing your quest

No more of the day the good fics died.

They'll come once more, and we won't

Sigh, sigh, and get ready to cry

Navigate as of late

To FanFiction-ask why

PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh

This WON'T be the day good writers die

This WON'T be the day good writers die.

They'll come once more, and we won't

Sigh, sigh, and get ready to cry

Navigate as of late

To FanFiction-ask why

PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh

This WON'T be the day good writers die

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Well, there you have it. I hope that it was enjoyable to read and got the point across. Flames are accepted. However, as I said in the summary, most of the flamers are trying to eliminate bad fanfiction-which is exactly what I strive to do with this song. Rather pointless, then, to do so.

Sincerely,

Sheva Das


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